Since the sofa won't be coming with us, I've been spending a little time exploring the online showrooms for Ikea and other discount (and non-discount) furniture shops. Probably won't be able to act on it anytime soon, but its a nice distraction. (I'm convinced you need just a hint of schizophrenia to survive long term layoffs and unemployment. A dash of denial helps too. You should try it.)

Either way, a girl can dream. So I select "Living Room" and "Sofas." Page after page after endless page of.... White upholstery?? Are they serious? Or is this a covert and elaborate economic stimulus package to fix our economy via cleaning services?

Behold! The brave Maasi hunter enters the fluffy, white savanna of the living room. He spies his prey, the vile kitty cat who mauled his G.I Joe not a day before. Slowly he approaches. Within range, he springs over the arm of the sofa. His shoes leave black scuffs of great justice and a flurry of shed fur as the villain flees. His sippy cup falls, scattering drops of grape juice like rich, purple blood upon the pristine whiteness.

And lo! The great domestic goddess solves it all with a call to Stanley Steamer, the carpet cleaners! Yet another push towards economic recovery! Yippie! Praise be the soldiers of economic recovery!

Okay, someone level with me. The person(s) who came up with this trend are those strange, ultra clean people... aren't they?

You know, the ones who don't have pets, kids, or deal with the occasional chucklenut who couldn't hold a glass if his life depended on it. They obviously never have to sleep or take a nap on the couch either. Probably never had to deal with a leaky diaper either... be it adult or infant.

To be fair, they had a few options for most of the sofas: Granny Floral, cream, beige, and ecru. A few offered bizarre, eye-searing plaids and baby-vomit pastels (think the early 90s) just for giggles.

Thanks for the laugh, designers! I really needed that. But can you show me the real upholstery now?

EDIT: evil_kimba, your RW action figures are on their way. ^_^ Thank you so much for giving them a home! <3

The rapid push to move before we wind up homeless continues. I opened a box and found 5 Ronin Warriors action figures.

They're in their original packaging, unopened. I got them from Big Lots back when I was at college the first time and they still have their $2.99 "Great Bargain!" sticker on them.

I have:
- Ryo
- Cye
- Sage
- Cale
- "Hariel" (White Armor Ryo)

I don't have room for them anymore. If you want them, please say so now and give me your address so I can ship them to you. You have one week before I take them off to the local Goodwill. This is first-come, first-serve, unfortunately. I would prefer they go to a fellow fan than wind up destroyed by some little kid. >_<

*HUGS* Thanks

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Yes, I do.

Back when my dog, Luna, was a puppy we would play quietly on my bed. It was a routine we did as I was waking up each morning or after a stressful day at college. We'd lay on our backs and I would tickle under her muzzle. She would attempt to "nibble" my fingertips and would swing her paws to try to trap my arm. I'd also blow lightly into her nose or lightly pinch her canine teeth. The play wasn't rough, but rather quiet, gentle, relaxing, and bonding.

When she was maybe 6 months old, we were doing this same thing one lazy Sunday afternoon. I don't know if she swung or I rose up into her paw... but she sliced my right eyelid open.

I make sure all my animals know some very basic commands as soon as possible: "No", "Stop", and "Come". When I ordered "stop," she stopped instantly and froze in place. I de-tangled her little nail from my eye and ran to the bathroom.

While I waited for help to arrive, I cuddled her. She was very distressed, cowering, submissive.

I ended up going to the ER to get stitches. It wasn't bad, there wasn't any damage done to my eye... it was just my eyelid. (I found out years later I do have a very small scratch on my cornea.) In fact, I was cracking jokes as I went through the ER and got my Tetanus booster, etc.

When I got home, though, my beautiful puppy was still cowering. Still far more submissive than normal. Every time she looked up at the bandage over my right eye, she was whimpering. Even after my eye healed, she'd see a bandaid and would become distressed.

Eventually, she became my service dog. But she still doesn't like seeing bandaids or wound dressing.

Since Dallas and Richmond still seem to be about equal, I spent most of the day investigating Richmond, VA colleges. I want to finish my computer science degree someday, so planning the move to include going back makes a certain amount of sense.

The dilemma comes in when you're a non-traditional student looking to join a college or university. Most higher education institutions are planned with the 18 - 21 demographic in mind. Transfer guidelines are strict and continuing or adult educational programs are, well, skimpy at best.

I can send you my ACT/SAT scores; but, I hope you don't mind 11 year old scores.

I wish I had had the foresight back in college the first time to pursue computer science. However, at 18 I wanted nothing more than for my estranged family members to love me, acknowledge me, look at me without negatively comparing me to another cousin who made it into Harvard or some other prestigious school. So I chose something based on what I thought would make them happy with me. And naturally, I failed. I had the chance to switch majors to computer science, but I my heart wasn't in it anymore.

Now, at almost 30... I'm in a bit of dilemma. I called and discussed admissions with a few colleges and found myself pointed towards their adult educational programs and their transfer student information.

A letter of recommendation from a former professor, seriously? What are the odds they remember me after this long?

Don't get me wrong, I like the idea of the personal enrichment programs. I plan on pushing mom to take a few, just to keep her mind active since dementia runs in the family. (Though I don't think she's in too much danger watching her tear through the Hellfire Peninsula in WoW.) But they're not what I want. I don't want to be limited to paralegal, nursing, or a small handful of degrees. But apparently, at 30, I to prove I'm a serious student even more than I did at 18.

Which blows.

(Tagged from: 7th Cavalry Guild Forums)



My ancient, battered, but oh-so-comfortable computer chair. The cats used to scratch the arms when they were kittens, so the arms have huge holes in the upholstery. I threw a scrap of polar fleece over the right arm. Someday I'll replace it.

Tag: Anyone who feels like participating. ;)

One thing I wanted to do with my new blog designs and social networking sites was get an up-to-date picture of myself to display.

I don't have a digital camera or a cell phone... and not sure who does around me. Jass has an older pre-paid cell that he uses to make calls from work. So that won't work.

I suddenly remembered my webcam, so I went spelunking in the closet to see if I could find it. Yippie! Found! But the disk was strangely curved. Fearing the worst, I pulled it out of its envelope and discovered it was cracked right in half.

To teh Intarwebz, Batman! Grabbed the software from the Logitech site, went to install, and discovered that the current version of the software and driver aren't compatible with my camera. There's no sign of the old versions of the software and driver either.

So back to the drawing board.


EDIT: WOOT! I umm, wouldn't suggest the site I found the software/driver on... but it works!

Dear Neil,
I have had a hopeless crush on you since I was 14. For a while, I honestly thought I loved you.

You were my friend back when it was socially undesirable to be my friend. Our friendship was intense and I actually did fantasize about a distant future with you someday.

Today, though, I realize that all I had was a crush. An infatuation.

We don’t understand each other and can’t relate anymore. For a while, you’ve been against me entering into computers. Today, when you blatantly told me to give up my dreams and become a truck driver… the distance between us became clear.

Thank you for being my friend. For that, I will be always thankful. I wish nothing but the best for you.

Goodbye.

Simply yours,
- Sally

Yes, I refused my dad's apology.

It was back in 1991... maybe 1992 and my parents had begun divorce proceedings. My dad was a serious alcoholic... to this day I suspect he was into other drugs, but I can't prove it. He was verbally abusive and headed quickly towards physical abuse. The courts had just ruled that he had to move out of the house.

Either way, my dad had concocted this crazy fable that our neighbor - a single mother of 4 - was out to break up their marriage and had the hots for him. Anything she said in front of him was suspect, no matter how innocuous. I was best friends with her oldest and anything they said was suspect. He was prone to these fables. One story alleged that another single mother in the neighborhood came to the door naked when he took us kids around to sell fundraiser candy. The story would change from where she had her blouse unbuttoned too low to completely unbuttoned to just her bra to topless to naked. Sometimes in a single telling. (No, she didn't. >_> She was fully clothed.)

He spent the next week after he had been removed from the house making drunken, obscene, and threatening phone calls for the entire night. We had to turn the phone off, but we could hear the answering machine cycling over and over. We filled a good half dozen answering machine tapes of his rant. He threatened to kidnap us, we "did" this to him, we were in "his" house, mom had "brainwashed" us kids to hate him... yadda yadda yadda.

He also threatened to murder our neighbor. And he was graphic in his description. We called the police the next morning when we discovered it and I had the honor of helping the officer listen to maybe 15 - 20 minutes of his messages. The officer then went back to his car and pulled out an evidence bag. In went all the tapes.

He went to jail.

When I saw him again, he tried to apologize. Well, what he called an apology. "She had it coming" he said. He claimed he wouldn't have hurt the kids and that witnessing their mother's murder or her being murdered wouldn't have harmed them. He said the murder my best friend's mother wouldn't have harmed me either. It was a "simple mistake" and, he claimed, he'd learned from it. His sister, Sue, insisted the same thing and said I was being "ridiculous" when I refused to accept.

I refused to hear it. I refused to accept it.

I cut off contact with him; I saw him maybe 5 - 7 times after that until his death in 2007.

Yes, I have a bad case of ADHD today. Probably doesn't help I'm listening to my most hyper of my music right now either. (I just got a Last.fm account.)

Ever since mom lost her job, I've been in a very strange mood. On one hand, I'm very nostaligic -- remembering things I used to love and things from my childhood -- and on the other, I've thrown out a lot of things that should have made me very nostalgic. My Ronin Warrior tapes... the ones I fought so hard to get? Out with the trash a couple weeks ago. I'll buy the DVDs someday. Trading cards and comics? To Goodwill, baby!

I have this huge box of vintage My Little Pony stuff ready to go out with the trash next week. (Before anyone has kittens, it's the houses and accessories. They're nasty, yellowed, brittle, and filled with dead bugs and mouse droppings.)

By the way... if anyone knows anyone who turns old My Little Ponies into art, let them know I have close to 100 I would be willing to sell. I cross-posted this a million places. ^^;

Job Scams... since I have my resume up on Monster.com and Career Builder, I keep getting these hilarious e-mail scams. "Work from home! Give us your bank account information! All you have to do is cash checks for us!" lol Or my favorite "Unlimited earning potential! Just send us a check for $1000 and we'll send you our guaranteed training materials!" Latest one made it sound like it was from a bank, but when you followed the link, it went to a web site in the Czech Republic. *shakes her head*

What's sad is there's probably a disturbing number of people that go for those.

Anyway, in the mood I'm in expect another spam... err... blog post in another hour. (Raid tonight can't come fast enough... give me something to focus on.)

Think I've finally got a design finalized for Simply, Sally.

I'm down to having to make the footer and sidebar, which is driving me nuts. Current trends in blog design have you putting more than just a copyright down there, but links to things like recent posts, recent comments, Flickr streams, and stuff like that.

I know what I want to put in them, but I can't figure out what to make them look like. Typeface, headers, etc. I don't want to make anything too detailed, since the design is supposed to be iconic and simple.

You can see the progression here:

Version 1
Version 2
Version 3 - Final

We've narrowed down the two areas we think we want to move to:

• Richmond, VA
• Dallas, TX

Without going into a lot of details regarding our reasons, please tell us about them. We want the good, the bad, the ugly. Even a "WTF are you looking there...?!" with your reasoning would be appreciated.

Help me out here!

They had this interview with David Littman on the news yesterday and lets just say I'm more convinced than ever that relocating is probably the best idea at this point. (Warning, this video is fairly long.)

 

 

The Economic Impact of the Auto Crisis on Michigan from Mackinac Center on Vimeo.

 

In a nutshell, Michigan unemployment could reach 20% by the end of the year. Mr. Littman also touches on some of the policies he thinks contributed to Michigan's failing economy.

All-in-all, it's very frightening.

I've had the opinion for a while that Michigan has been mismanaged for decades; certain government policy sounds more like it came out of the 1970s.

A good chunk of our manufacturing supports or supported the automotive industry. I remember some classmates back in High School saying they were skipping college because their parents could get them into their workplace... usually a factory supporting the automotive industry. Back a few months ago (before the bailouts and talk of Chapter 11), one local commercial for GM trucks depicted romanticized views of people working on a farm with the tagline "There's nothing like a classic."

Why in the world has Michigan been allowed to remain stagnant? We've been allowed to be nothing but manufacturing. Many Michigan towns and cities only have one major employer, with larger ones having maybe 2 or 3. Didn't they ever ask what would happen if something happened to that employer?

Some of these employers paid rediculous amounts of money for overly simple jobs. But yet over and over, I see people who were completely unprepared for when they couldn't be paid that much.

Few went to college with their money and if they did, they went for degrees with very little demand or chose a popular one that now has left the market for that degree saturated. (Really, how many daycares and preschools does a town of 7000 need?)

Yeah, I need to move. *hops off her soapbox*

I seem to invite people to psychoanalyze me. The simplest things I say or do seem to indicate some deep psychological thing™ I'm apparently not aware of or am deluding myself over.

I can't figure out why the heck people keep doing this to me. It's so annoying. For example:

• "Oh, I enjoy Japanese Animation -- Anime." Two types of analysis comes from this: A.) I am some poor idiot who was ill-prepared for adulthood and thus cling to my cartoons like a life-preserver. B.) I'm some kind of repressed nymphomaniac who gets off on animated porn. (It all depends on whether they think anime is all kid's stuff or all porn.)



• "I play World of Warcraft." Psychoanalysis: I'm a raging video game addict. Apparently I'm at high risk for skipping work to play the game or even trying to play it while I'm at work. Even worse is when someone drops by unannounced, catch me playing, and a simple "Yes" to "Playing World of Warcraft?" and it somehow implicates me for a raging addiction.



• "I have allergies to most soaps, so I don't do the dishes." Psychoanalysis: I'm lazy.
  
  Explanation: I get allergic contact dermatitis from most liquid soaps if I have to be in contact with them for longer than it takes to wash my hands. I get similar reactions to certain brands of triple antibiotic ointment and certain molds found on Oak leaves. Several skin reactions have had to be treated with rather unpleasant injections.

How exactly am I supposed to respond to this sort of thing? Seriously. Most of the time any effort made to refute, defend, or absorb/deflect winds up somehow further proving their analysis. Even silence or walking away seems to support their stance. They're either Dr. Phil or they think any possible reaction I give is completely uproarious. Even a facepalm or rolled eyes.

Unfortunately, I've even developed the habit of attempting to "pre-defend" myself... which makes it even worse. That is, I try to explain my reasoning when I present the issue at hand. (Especially on message boards.)

A good, recent example of that: I posted on Monster.com, asking for advice on whether mentioning I play World of Warcraft on my blogs and Facebook could actually hurt my chances for hiring. For some stupid reason, I felt I had to pre-defend myself. I got my answer from one of their career coaches and I'm satisfied, but now it's attracted someone who's doing the psychoanalysis thing again. (e.g. "ZOMG! Because you said the game isn't a problem and you have a full social life you're a raging addict!") *facepalm*

While I know I shouldn't care about what they say (I have no intention of even bothering to reply to the bozo on Monster.com)... for once! Just for once! I'd like to do something novel and have what I say taken at face value. Just for once.

Pretty please?

It's about time I finish my Web Design degree. I haven't been able to find an internship the old fashioned way, so I'm taking my plea to the sites I haunt.

I will Design and assist in implementing a Web site design for free. The catch? You need to be willing to sign off on a form from my college that says I did this for you. That likely means you need to be of legal age.

There are some things I'll only be able to guide you through due to my financial limitations, such as getting your domain and hosting for your site. Otherwise, the rest of my design services will be free.

You can see an online version of my resume here and my portfolio located at DeviantArt.

Serious offers only, please.

Wednesday, mom became the latest victim of the economy when she was laid off from Kalfact / Klein Plastics.

Overall, it's a relief, since she no longer has to worry about that place anymore, but now we're in even more dire financial straights than ever. We'll be fine for this month, but I have no idea how we'll do beyond this.

Woke up at 6:30am with another of my anxiety attacks. I keep telling myself it's just my PMS again, but I can't seem to calm down.

I completely anticipate being told yet again to get rid of my animals and more abuse from my extended family if we reach out for help. So I guess this is crunch time: Find a job or move.

Moving to a more economically diverse and stable area is winning so far.

Hands down, Chrono Trigger for the Super Nintendo. Akira Toriyama, creator of Dragon Ball, was responsible for the art. When it came out, the art was visually stunning and made use of the entire color palette available to the SNES.

I loved the plot, the concept, and the characterizations. It could have been longer and it left a lot of loose ends at the conclusion, but I still love the game and have purchased every port that's come out.

If you want to go older "old school", then probably Legend of Zelda.

We've known that we have a mouse problem for a bit. We had a cold, snowy winter here in Michigan and our place looks out over an old farm field. We also fixed our storage shed last fall and filled in all the holes, so it stands to reason why they came in.

For most of the winter, we've only heard them... no signs of gnawing or mouse droppings anywhere. I set a few traps, which never caught anything.

For Easter and for general "give me crunchy/salty/sweet/chocolate and no one has to die" purposes we baked cookies and had to use a couple slices of fresh bread to soften our brown sugar. We never generate too much trash, so our kitchen waste basket has been empty for the most part. The only thing in it were the two (now stale) pieces of bread.

Bedtime comes and we head to bed like we normally do.

To cut to the chase: A mouse got into the kitchen trash can. Which is something I'd find out only after I peeled myself off the ceiling. But could Kaze tell me in a civilized way?

Without warning, there comes the most unholy racket from the kitchen, ending with the crash of a 20 lbs feline missile impacting the base cabinets.

And without any other assistance, I think I came awful close to kissing my bedroom ceiling.

The joys of pet ownership. ;-)

Back when I was in Junior High School, my favorite science teacher had this great poster up in her classroom. It read "The chances of someone being caught is directly proportional to the stupidity of their actions." The graphic itself was a photograph of a kitten that had fallen head-first into a flowerpot.

It was so true and cute all at the same time.

Well, I am directly proving that myself today.

Thanks to the extra long heating season Michigan is experiencing, my hair is very dry. It's beyond the point where conditioners don't really help anymore. So, I went hunting on the web and found a recipe for a homemade, conditioning hair mask using eggs, olive oil, apple-cider vinegar, and essential oils. It sounded great, it smells fantastic... I hoped it was going to give me great results.

So, I got out a small cereal bowl and whisked everything together. Then I grabbed our oldest pastry brush and trucked down to the bathroom.

I am now sitting here with cheerful, bright yellow slime -- about the perfect consistency to allow me to fantasize that I've been slimed a la Ghostbusters -- dripping in a steady stream down my face, back, and chest despite the plastic cap I'd bought for just his occasion.

Yes, I can just imagine being caught right about now. "Umm, Hello Mr. Building Super.... why yes, I had a really hot date with Slimer and he offered to help me do my hair. Want him to do yours too?" After which point I miraculously find pictures of myself on YouTube, Facebook, and MySpace looking stupid for all the world to see.

I'll let you know how it turns out.



EDIT: It was just gross. *giggles* No real effect on my hair aside from making it smell nice for a short time. I'll be buying a hair mask from Lush as soon as I can.

I finally broke down and got a Facebook account today. Not like I'll have time to update it like the rest of my things... *grins sheepishly* So in case anyone wants to follow me and my insanity, I can now be found on the following social networking sites:

• Facebook
• LinkedIn
• BrightFuse

Don't be alarmed that it says Richmond, VA instead of Michigan. Since I'm highly considering moving to Richmond, I wanted to start trying to locate contacts in the area.

I suppose I do somewhat, but not as much as I used to. I tend to emote myself to be a lot more of a huggy, feely person online than I am in real life.

In real life, I seldom hug anyone except for very close friends and family and only under specific circumstances. Otherwise, I don't even like holding hands. (My carpal tunnel makes it quite painful, though my mom tells me I didn't even like it as a child.)

I'm also more reserved in real life than I am online. I don't always find it comfortable talking to people in real life, mainly because I find it difficult to trust. People have taken advantage of my trust and violated my right to privacy - sometimes for nothing more than entertainment. Thus, I really don't tend to be as open as I am online.

I share thoughts, ideas, emotions on my blogs and with online friends I really don't even try sharing with the rest of the world.

For example, I learned the hard way not to mention anything about my relationships or my personal life at my last workplace. Anything and everything was entered straight into the gossip circuit without so much as a pause to ask if I really wanted this to be shared. Eventually it reached a point where people I didn't know were literally confronting me in the middle of work about my relationship. Whereas, online, no one has felt the need to talk to me or confront me about my relationships. Ask how it's going, sure. Commiserate when the relationship ends, absolutely.



And completely separate from this subject, but still on the topic of a divided self:

Yesterday: Yay! Spring!

Windy Day + 20 minutes outside raking leaves = Holy Hayfever, Batman!

Today: Spring sucks.